Voices – Journal 11/19/18

This month has marked another good turning point in a couple of spheres for myself.

Photography: getting paid for it. Drones? Repaired and able to fly (after demonstrating what is undoubtedly amazing electrical engineering skills by having a battery explode in my hands). Website? On point, with a better layout and more effective front page. A copy of Microsoft Office so I can actually be productive on my machine? What does this mean exactly?

One of the things I’ve struggled to take care of is actually come up with a publication that’s somewhat all-encompassing of my work. Something for the drone side, the photography side, the poetry side, and even the short story side. Since I have an idea of where the Deneb Mythos are going and Reality City is alive on the site and in the airwaves, I can sit down and come up with a publication that at least covers my bases for the big three. Poetry, drones, and photography.

So that’s good. A step in the right direction. That, and another step has been made towards backing up RRC on as much as possible again. Now, this includes Betaflight, and all my drone flash memory files. As well as stuff from professional portraiture. Never before has Radio Reality City been known to have that in its portfolio, but it does now, and I have indeed gotten a couple of gigs here and there.

But there is one phenomenon still looming that I am quite afraid of. My poetry output has waned to the point that ‘one a day’ posting is no longer feasible for the long term. As you’ve likely noticed, I haven’t had a lot of stuff to put up in the name of photography either outside of recent shoots. I still don’t have a super well-defined release schedule for broader lengths of content overall. The ideal is to have a M-T-W-Th-F schedule of content centered around different aspects of Radio Reality City, my setup for it just isn’t concrete yet.

Unfortunately for the site, but fortunately for me, I’ve been able to do a lot day-to-day, so the times that come to pass for being able to focus on content here comes about just once or twice a week.

shrouded edit

Because stuff like this is what I’ve been up to! I’ve gotten much better at overall composition, direction, and editing of photos in the last few weeks. It’s been a while since October, but that’s okay. It’s happening now. I’m doing work!

I hope that’s enough for an update. If you happen to be a regular (or anyone, really), feel free to peruse the writing page and flick through some of those short stories. If you’re looking for some reading material, I am always looking for feedback on execution of these things. In what will hopefully be a slight petering out of content, I would love to see my short stories grow into a respectable side of Radio Reality City.

Thanks for tuning in, as always, and continue to consume reality!

Radio Reality City!





CQC – Journal 10/18/18

Yo, what’s up guys, it’s your boy Jake here with another Minecraft unboxing video. We’re going to be hoping for some SWEET EXOTIC SKINZ, blessed by papa Notch…

Fuck all that.

Hey guys, it’s me. The person that runs this website. I’m still alive! As if constant output didn’t outwardly display that fact, let me reassure you that stuff is still moving, but it’s all moving in such a weird, opaque way. Whatever. Thanks for sticking around through existential bouts of apathy as well as all the other stuff.

Before we move on, if you’d like to stay current with my everyday creative exploits and otherwise, I better spew some social media links out here, right? It’s a lot easier to post something to Instagram and Snapchat than it is to put up on the site.


You can get me on Snapchat at my user jakethomasshaw. That’s right, no identity thieves are going to misrepresent me anytime soon.

And speaking of the site in general, as of right now Radio Reality City is a little confused on what it wants to be. I’ve realized that there are a couple of major arms to this whole thing, but it is kraken-like in its ability to ensnare anything I do creatively. There’s not a lot of order outside of tabs and that kind of stuff. With older versions of PHP going out of business here really soon, I’m worried about what might break but ready to tackle it in anticipation of having a harder, better, faster, stronger understanding of where this is all going.

I’m a poetry-writing, photo-taking, drone-building thing. And right now those things are very discordant with one another. There hasn’t been harmony since drones joined the fray and gave me a third major way of expression. And now with the Sony and GoPro, I can add video to my list confidently. Among other things. But those three arms remain:




Even on the site right now they are not represented as well as I’d like, and I guess the only trouble I’m having creatively right now is a solution to this issue. I’ve tried to tackle it in the past, as recently as July and June with the major site overhauls, and while that made everything a little more aesthetically pleasing, it didn’t help my urge to organize further very much. So I suppose that’s the next big thing on my list.

The next big thing after that is a new drone frame, a Martian II or an Alien. Something superfast that can have a GoPro strapped to the top of it. That’s pretty fun.

But until site stuff changes, the currency of my situation is very much geared toward photography. With new lenses and new understandings, research on theory, and all that stuff, I am still (full disclosure) finding a hard time striking a balance with a full time job and photography as a hobby/side gig. No amount of gear will give me more time.

When classes at the Art Institute start, oh man, I’ll be doing photography all right, but not in ideal environments, I suppose. Well, I’m not sure yet actually.

Just a lot all over the place, but that’s normally the reality of my life.

Another full disclosure, is that I’ve been willfully putting a lot of energy into my job in order to be financially secured for such undertakings as the Art Institute. Such things are needed at this time to keep moving forward.

And within all this, I had to turn down that club I was doing video work for a couple of weeks. I showed a demo reel that may or may not ever be published now, and when I brought up the topic of compensation, they were hesitant to mention that most people who work at the club do it for exposure. Said the industry professional.

So I rapidly decided to never return, unfortunately. It was a good little reel, too. So at least I know I can do that now.

But hey, more reality checks for me to cash in when I need all that credit.

Thanks for sticking with reality, everyone. It can be rough, and sometimes it can be downright lackluster. If that’s the case, I do invite you to comment on what’s awful so I can take a look at it.

Consume reality!

Radio Reality City!

Mirrorless Cage – Journal 7/23/18

It’s been a while since I wrote the last journal. Almost 20 days or so, and the change of winds is palpable even on the website now for Year V’s ramp up. It’s creeping deep into my bones and moving my flesh above those.

Year V is upon us, and it feels like I’m walking through a door to a second chance at what the last five years have meant. Things are much different now. Down to the tiniest little detail. Doing new kinds of things. Listening to new types of stuff. Making new kinds of art.

All the while, life has to happen, so journals will shift in format slightly to compensate for the downtime in between them. I’m working full-time now, doing more when I go out, now, and writing so rarely that instead of an author of reality I’m now more of a photojournalist of reality. Doesn’t mean that poetry will ever stop. Just less of it these days as taking pictures of each experience dominates.

Myself, and something hilarious is apparently going on someplace.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve gone to see a production of the Rocky Horror Picture Show, shadowcast locally in Tacoma. My SO’s friend had a part in the shadow cast, and it was a pretty awesome experience all told. Go to one of those things if they happen near you.

Bellingham saw me walk among its cobbled roads again, having lunch at the Western Washington University lunch room. Woods Coffee called my name once more. And I got to walk around Fairhaven for the first time after hearing so much about it so long ago. Even though the Monarch went, it didn’t fly. Didn’t feel right, not this time. I have to be a proper tourist first, and make a special drone trip out next time I’m hitting some spots up near the border.

Nadine at Fairhaven.

I could no longer find use out of the 80D, and so I switched gears completely. I am now the proud owner of something more befitting the way I use it, the Sony Alpha 6300. Mirrorless all the way. And also 4k video doesn’t hurt much either. Traded in the box set for the 80D, got the 6300 the same day, and ordered myself a little camera cage for it from smallrig. I’m a little more comfortable using it for street photography than I was with the 80D, and I’m glad, because that was the whole damn point. The cage also gives it an exo-skeleton feel, as well as giving me the opportunity to customize a rig for it.

I gave my SO the SL1, my favorite 18-55 EF-S, and a 55-250 IS telephoto. Distancing myself from Canon suddenly just because Sony has the edge on the technology, and the DSLR world is headed for mirrorless technology. For me, it was a no-brainer. Especially after putting it through the wringer.


Year V will not start explosively. It will start, and it will simply begin as it means to go on.

With that in mind, here’s a poem I’ve written called “Uncaged”:

“What can a
Mirrorless cage
Hope to look out to
With a lens to cover
Wide angles
And telephoto distance
Guarded by a hood?


Inspired by this little camera I have now as my every day carry.


This might be the last journal you get from me until Year V. 7 or 8 days left to go. We can do it.

Consume reality!

Radio Reality City!


Paradox – Journal 7/7/2018

Been a while. Some cool stuff has happened. These journals are becoming more sparse as things cool on and off around the station. Which, I can call my new PC setup the station proper.

A journal or two ago I mentioned Unreal Engine 4 developments for the Oculus Rift but boy is Unreal hard to get into as a beginner. I was chatting with a Unity dev the other day who ushered me to give that engine a try over Unreal. I’m not planning on making the next big hit, just a toolkit to play around with creative stuff. My end goal for this outing is to create a reality to write poetry in. So Unity is actually being a little more manageable.

The 80D has been acquired, and with it a host of new shots and capability like with the SL1. Except this time I’m getting even more megapixel coverage and some other neat features built into a heavier frame.

I’ve been able to shoot my sister’s wedding with it so far, with a couple of the shots added to the portfolio section of the site as well as a video posted to the multimedia spot. I edited it together for her and used music by Tycho, and after getting in contact with a Ghostly International label representative, I am proud to announce that I have been allowed the use of Tycho’s music so long as they are credited in my work and the productions go unmonetized! So that’s pretty damn exciting, I’d say!

Something also came up, but is possibly a controversial move. I have decided to make a watermark for Radio Reality City and its photos. You’ll see it start applying to photos from about two days ago, and its usage is something I will continue to use as time goes on. I’m still in a critical period where I need to market myself any which way. Recently I’ve also been paying more attention to social media outlets and what their usage could mean for the expansion of RRC. So far it’s been pretty good.

I also decided to dazzle up the logo a little bit, and OBS will let me record with some versatility, so here’s a little show of how I did it!

Today I was almost dead-set on getting a gimbal for my DSLRs but decided against it. There are some more pressing matters to attend to right now, and to be honest I haven’t really been without a gimbal long enough to know how to make good video and take steady shots on my own. I’ve tried, but haven’t been all that successful yet.

But I have the new DSLR, new portfolio material, and through my work I’ve actually been able to become certified in the operation and technical aspects of a bunch of camera manufacturers. Now added to my LinkedIn profile.

Slow going on a lot of other things thanks to the amount of stuff I’m actually doing these days. My camera and notebook still follow me wherever I go. Nothing has changed from two years ago.

Thank you all for helping me continue in all this. For your continued support in general and viewership. It really means a lot to me. And consider giving to reality on Patreon to give us here something to keep the lights going!

So please, consume reality!

Radio Reality City!



Assault Canon – Journal 6/27/18

Currently typing this from my phone, because my desktop is five feet away and I can’t be bothered. It’s been a long day.

So, the last journal left off with the promise of getting an 80D by day’s end, and I am happy to announce that I did indeed get a professional grade camera in the Canon 80D. I have been having a lot of fun looking at it, but I haven’t been out to really get some mileage on it.

Queue this mid-week weekend. My sister wants to get married on the beach, and so she’s set up a camping trip to get married on the second day with my soon-to-be brother-in-law. Cool guy. But I realized something today while going into work, is that I’m going to be taking a lot of photos, so I need more battery power.

Smash cut to 6:30 or so today when I am once again taking a trip up to Seattle with two friends of mine. This time for a battery grip and an extra battery.


So in all it’s glory, here is the new rig for Radio Reality City. Nothing electronic has ever been so satisfying to hold.

I’m taking my XS, the SL1, and the 80D, all fully loaded on batteries, all with their own SD cards in them for a total of about 144GB of storage, my two 18-55mm lenses, my 50-250mm telephoto, my 24mm macro, and my 18-135mm lens. Since we’re going to be on the coast, the Monarch will naturally be going as well.

A notebook and plenty of pens are coming along, too. Don’t worry.

Poetry posting is going to come to a halt here for a week or so, as I will A) be away from keyboard and B) am currently refraining from releasing let’s say time sensitive pieces. Not the right time, and maybe not the right place to put some poems from a few months back. I’ll have to think of a way to get them out in a friendly manner later on.

But poetry writing is moving right along. Once again: don’t worry.

And as this short entry draws to a close, I’d actually like to take a moment to thank someone who will never read this. Erik was a guy I met some years back, housesat for, and was interested to find that he was an exceptional photographer. He got me interested in the craft immensely, and I owe a lot of the maturation of my philosophy to the art of photography to him. So Erik, if you’re ever going to find yourself reading this, I thank you. Was a big help to start off with someone so knowledgeable.

Alright, radio silence is going to fall after this one is posted. Nothing scheduled. Maybe nothing going to come out until Sunday night or Monday morning. There’s a lot to do between now and then.

But we’re not dead! Still feel free to peruse https://radioreality.city to your heart’s content while I’m away! After all, isn’t that what discovery is all about?

Consume reality!

Radio Reality City!

Yo, What’s Up – Journal 6/22/18

Ladies and gentlemen, I came to the realization of something pretty cool two days ago. I now have a PC that can handle expanding and also deal with the rigors of editing 4k video. I’ve had a recent burst of inspiration from all things virtual reality (as the name itself implies, you might have guessed), and I quickly got the idea that I could probably develop something for the Oculus Rift in Unreal Engine 4 to have a piece of Radio Reality City be able to be experienced.

I started with a landscape, where I’m going to sculpt terrain to make it look how I imagine the station sitting atop its hill. And then I might be able to make parts of Reality City itself. Have it be something I can walk through, and publish so that others can walk through it, too.

Why stop there? Why not create an environment where I can put on the Oculus, write poetry in VR and then have those files show up as .png or .txt on my desktop? Isn’t that kinda where I’ve been headed this whole time?

Hell, just go take a look at Somewhere Else, again, and you could see why I’m giddy at the idea of this. It’d be crazy to build this place. Build places. Why stop at poetry? If I can make the environments I write about, why wouldn’t I want to see what the beaches of Murmur look like? Or the great heights of Poikilothermal?

It’s a little overwhelming, so I’ve stopped working on the first environment I started. I don’t have an Oculus yet, and that’s a good thing. I don’t want to constantly find new outlets, overwhelm myself, and end up making nothing. So I’ve been writing poetry again, of things I have had yet to tackle. It’s good to get back to basom.

And today is going to mark another milestone for me. Year 5 of Radio Reality City will start with an editing PC, a Canon 80D, and a DJI Mavic Pro. Today, I will get the 80D.

7 more megapixels, ever more autofocus points, and a more professional frame. I’ll finally be breaking out from the Rebel series, which in itself isn’t a bad series, it just is NOT professional grade. Frankly, I’m surprised I’ve gotten what I have out of the old XS and SL1. I’m going to be able to do so much more good stuff. It’s going to be fun bringing it home. The 80D is at least no longer entry level stuff. Now that I know what I’m doing after three years of this stuff, I feel confident taking on a much more powerful camera body.

Photography stuff will be at what it needs to be for a while. I don’t imagine I’ll get a full frame DSLR for a long time. In fact, after the 80D, I’ll probably go for a Sony mirrorless for the video stuff. DSLR sensors are not really made for prolonged exposure on the sensor. So I’ll probably be sticking to lenses for the next year or two.

But drone stuff will take off properly when I get the Mavic. All in due time, but it’s difficult to pace myself sometimes, I must admit. There’s so much to do and only so much time in one life. I want to be able to make it all with every tool I can.

Music making is quickly becoming an interest as I have Oculus stuff to think about, too. A good experience needs good sound design to go with it. I wonder how it’ll all turn out.

Second update this week out of Radio Reality City. More organization is in order!

And hopefully by Year V, there will be some organization around here! Who coded this bullshit?

Thank you for tuning in, and while you’re here, consume reality!

Radio Reality City!



I See in RGB – Journal 6/18/18

Yesterday I turned 21 years old, and was treated to a dinner and beach date by the love of my life who graciously took me out to eat, in formal wear, and it felt great. I didn’t have a drop of wine nor the corvidae-themed IPAs my sister and soon to be brother-in-law got me. It was actually quite redundant because I had more Turkish coffee last evening and that properly kept me awake until 2.

I intend to get a CC permit when it is convenient for me to, but until then yeah. 21. That’s kinda weird. It’s the last big birthday for a long time.

Let’s stop beating around that bush now, and beat around one twelve feet to the left, because I have OPERATIONAL news for Radio Reality City!

Ladies and gentlemen, I am now in possession of a real live editing PC! Sporting 8GB of RAM, a 2GB dedicated GPU, and 1TB of disk space, I now have the hardware and case I need to edit what I edit and beyond!

No longer shall I render 4k videos overnight! No longer shall I fear for overheating on the part of my laptop! No longer shall RRC live in my pocket while I’m at work, because that’s all it can fit on. The first thing I did upon plugging everything in was download all of RRC’s files and programs onto the hard drive, and the next day bought PlayerUnknown’s Battlegrounds after an inaugural match of Team Fortress 2. God damn, I can PC game now. And build more into my PC!

So when summer begins, and I record more and more and drone ever so slightly more as well, I will have a dedicated rig to support all of my interests. I might even start getting into VR dev stuff long enough to maintain a healthy interest!

It’s a short one for this journal. Just wanted to throw a little update out there and let you guys know what’s been happening around here.

Publishing has slowed down since I may actually finally be done with Pierce this time and am concentrating on work full time. Hopefully with that will come more opportunities to produce good content, as I’m still trying to hit a good stride for video stuff.

My friends and I did that Pirates! Gold recording, but that’s probably never going to see the light of day. It was awful. It was so bad. But we did it. So we can get better.

Honestly, I think the first thing I’m going to buy with my next paycheck is a proper fucking desk. This hunching over stuff is NOT conducive to a creative process.

With the uptick in everything else, poetry has taken a bit of a hit, but as usual what this means is that there’s plenty of material; it just hasn’t been written about yet.

So that’s all from myself tonight, I hope you’re all sleeping well and find the next couple of poems amusing at all!

Consume reality!

Radio Reality City!




Manual Drive – Journal 6/6/18

I’ve encountered an issue.

My HDD consumption has reached a point where even on this brand new laptop I have no memory left over if I have all the files of Radio Reality City onboard. I have to have it all on an expandable memory device. Which sucks because it’s not all readily accessible, but it also simply makes sense to archive the stuff I won’t be using.

Unfortunately, after March, I moved to the old model of posting where I manually post a poem in the morning. And today I’ve arrived at class without my HDD to plug in, find the poem I WOULD be posting this morning, and schedule/post the thing.

I’ve mentioned before, but after I got my SL1 and Phantom 3 my memory consumption exploded. A whole day’s outing can be up to 50GB of space now, and this laptop’s only got 500GB of space. So you might imagine that as long as I’m making videos, I’m going to take up a lot of space. Before, a poem could take up literally KILOBYTES of space. Up to 5KB for ONE poem. Outrageous. And then photos typically take up 30MB of space per shot. That used to be the spot I used the most memory in.

One of my biggest worries has been in being able to keep all this stuff in multiple places, safe. Even thinking so far as to make my own cloud server to host in my bedroom so I can access Radio Reality City anywhere, but I do not yet have that technical knowhow.

So here I sit, unable to post a poem. That’s pretty great. Instead, I’ve been able to furnish this little journal.

Given that opportunity, I’d like to talk about a piece of literature I came across a while ago, called ‘The Psychopath’s Bible’ by a Dr. Christopher Hyatt. When you pick up this book and start reading it, it comes off like some real paranoia-inducing stuff. It’s a book that would have you believe that it’s teaching you how to be a psychopath, but approaching it from any other lens reveals its other side.

It can almost read like satire, once you peel back the surface. Hyatt himself was a very strange man, but he understood what he was doing when he was writing this book. He describes the condition of a psychopath as one that’s more than frowned upon in modern society, but breaks down the walls between distinctions until the qualities of a ‘psychopath’ are at their barest form.

Hyatt posits that what society calls ‘psychopathy’ is really just a state in which the individual cares about themselves above all others, and thus are seen as voracious machines of will. For the good and the bad, of course.

When I think of a psychopath, I certainly think of people like Ajit Pai, commissioned salesmen, day traders with big portfolios, and telemarketers. Acting in their own self-interests and eschewing society’s expectations of them in the name of the ego. Ironically enough, I’m currently sitting in a Sociology class right now. But the argument is built on the idea that we call people psychopaths in the Western world when they’re only looking out for themselves, saying that particular quality is not a bad thing.

If you were looking out for only yourself, that wouldn’t be negative on its own, would it?

Granted, Hyatt is a fucking nutter. This guy was legitimately into the occult, wrote books on Afro-magic, and other books on how to manipulate. But he was also a doctor of clinical and experimental psychology, and had masters degrees in two other disciplines.

Hyatt makes a good point. The qualities of a psychopath are given a bad rap, but in some primal ways having those qualities is necessary to survive. Moments where you need to have self-respect and do what’s best for you.

However, reading this book doesn’t make you think of that. It makes you think of people you know who have these qualities, and specifically pings moments in your life to make you think about psychopaths in general. These aren’t people with cluster B personality disorders, these are people who are in all their right mind and willfully make their way through the world, damn the consequences as long as they make it out okay.

Eventually the ideas seem to be making sense. After the initial learning curve of breaking through that wall, you find yourself agreeing with the societal expectation of what a psychopath is. It feels kinda… icky. Especially if you know someone that you would happily call a psychopath with no second thought.

The book is a really odd ball, straddling the fence of teenangst and satire. I still can’t quite figure it out, but I’ve seen a few other people who interpret it as a thing meant to be internalized and moved on from. Changes your perspective a little bit, and might even make you think before passing judgement on someone.

Personally, I consider myself to be utilitarian as a philosopher, so this psychopathy stuff doesn’t gel well with my own beliefs, but it’s interesting to think about nonetheless.

Anyways, sorry about the lack of posting today. I’ve been really busy and just left that expandable memory unit at home. Dangerous to do, these days.

If you enjoy the content here, I implore you to consider being a patron at https://www.patreon.com/thehostofrrc/ or buying my collection for Abandon Ship on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/Abandon-Ship-Jake-Shaw-ebook/dp/B079WKDRZG/.

Consume reality!

Radio Reality City!

Thanks for tuning in, everyone, and please roll on over to the website if you’ve seen anything you like!


21st Wishlist – Journal 6/1/18

Where I’ll attempt to write a poem about 2018 accounting in the form of my 21st birthday wishlist.

  1. Plate Carrier with Level 3 Trauma Plates for Front and Back
  2. Velcro ‘PRESS’ patch
  3. Bitcoin Mining Machine
  4. Helios Lens for EF Series
  5. Editing Desktop PC with tons of Upgrade Potential
  6. Tiny Whoop Racer – Awesome Sauce Edition
  7. FPV goggles

Well, friends, a lot has gone on. I’m currently deep in the throes of some heavy counter-intelligence operations, so I can’t say so much about what’s been going on in my life in particular, but I can tell you about all the creative stuff that’s happened as a result.

I got in touch with a local group of drone guys, who fly the FPV racing and stunt drones. These guys were mental, 3d printing camera housings, machining custom carbon fiber chassis for their drones, knowledgeable about all aspects of coding and engineering about the things they touch. I took the Monarch and tried my best to get good shots of them flying, but their drones are just way too fast to get good footage of with a Phantom 3.

But I got to fly one of their rigs and it was liberating. I know what my next creative stint is going to be in. Custom drone manufacturing.

As part of understanding that my website is still running on slightly archaic infrastructure, I have gone around and updated https://radioreality.city for navigational purposes and dropped a portfolio page into the menu structure, and included a new tab called “Multimedia” that will take you to all the digital stuff I’ve done. “Writing Projects” will now take you to just that, all of my other writing stuff that isn’t poetry or something of the sort.

My previous journals were spent bitching about how much I put on my plate, and to finish a metaphor I’ve started to chow down; the introduction of more rigid and grouped organizational structures has given me a lot of insight as to how to make things run more smoothly. Especially with the vastly different kinds of content you can find on the station. It’s cool at first, but without any organization it just turns into a fustercluck of data that nobody cares about, and that I used to neglect.

As I start embarking upon different avenues of creativity, I’ve been forced to evolve the site. This year, 2018, I’ve added drones, graphic design, digital arts, video, and streams to the catalog of Radio Reality city content.

Speaking of which, tomorrow I’m getting a group of friends together to do a playthrough of Pirates! Gold, the 1993 Sega Genesis game. Which is exciting, because I’ve been wanting to do something like this for a few years. I looked around and realized I had everything I needed to schedule a record and, wouldn’t you know it, I got a ROM of the game and got heavily invested after about 30 minutes of play time.

That video should show up as soon as I can edit it all together. Before we record I’m going to have to re-orient myself with OBS since it’s been nearly 4 years since I messed with it. Here’s to hoping I can record without incident.

Also a thing: I’m definitely in need of a PC with more than 500 gigs of storage space. 2k DSLR video and 4k Phantom footage takes up a LOT of space. Editing on a laptop with not a terribly powerful GPU is a nightmare.

21st birthday is this month, though. Hopefully it will yield some good memories and terribly useful technical stuff. Year V is 61 days away, and that will also yield some incredibly useful tools for continuing this journey. Things are heating up.

In the meantime, consume reality!

Radio Reality City!

Thank you for tuning in, and if you’d like to support the station please consider being a patron!

BRRRRRT – Journal 5/20/18

neutral awareness.png
Captain Neutral, standing out.

Wow, it’s been so long since I’ve done one of these that I nearly forgot how I structured the titles. But I remembered how to write poetry today, that’s pretty fucking nice.

Today is a very prominent day in my history. It has to do with my introduction and coming-of-age story that occurred over the course of five years starting in 2013. Back then I thought I knew everything. And every succeeding year after that, I continued to. At least when I was in high school I was a real narcissistic prick, but college gave way to a more ego-minded person. At least when I got into college I was ready to accept I would be among peers. This was true for a while.

Still, self-awareness isn’t valiant in and of itself. You have to do something with it. Self-actualize a little bit. Not let the mandala effect take over and erase all the good stuff.

That’s why Reality City is organized the way it is. Over the years since its inception, it’s developed into this theory of metacognition and a way of visualizing it. I approached my psyche professor about writing a paper on it as part of an optional piece we can do this quarter, and he was fully on board. It helps that he double-majored in philosophy when he was going through his master’s program.

Wordy wordy word word. Sorry about that. It’s just been a while since I’ve done a journal, today is a historic day in my life for a variety of reasons, and since my last journal things have drastically changed.

I’m now under the employ of a full-time, benefits-giving job that effectively triples my wage. Relationship stuff last week entered a fever pitch and now we’re in the aftermath of an impossible decision, Kirke and I. I’m now a professional photographer today with the assistance of a couple of friends who needed some wedding pictures done. And I look towards the future with more vigor than I was looking a month or so ago.

Something today has been renewed in me. Maybe it’s reading poetry indirectly meant for me that does the trick sometimes. Or just getting out and taking pictures of some very happy people ready to celebrate each other. My life since 5/20/13 has revolved around relationships, and now more than ever that’s true for only the best of reasons.

With university looming, I’ve now decided to save up for a new car that isn’t quite as destroyed as my jeep (and it turns out I might like subcompacts, the newer manual Fiat 500’s to be specific). Which, due to recent events, is no longer marked with my name. Anonymity on my part is the current name of a game that I can’t quite yet talk about, but when I can the fucking doors are going to blast open. No NDA, but simple timing is a weapon right now that I must use effectively. Don’t worry, Radio Reality City will not be cloaked in obscurity for very long.

That being said, the title of this journal is the sound an A10 Warthog makes when it fires its guns! Which is exactly what’s going to happen when the truth can be wrought.

See, Reality City is all about reality. If you know your ingsocs or thought police, even reality can be subject to interpretation and mismanagement. My fear of memory loss has even made me aware of confabulation and implantation, which are actually even more terrifying prospects than losing it all entirely.

So today I’ve been able to open up my notebook for a good honest crack at writing I haven’t been able to stomach for at least a month. I’ve been producing, just nothing done. Kirke seems to think I’m too hard on myself, but I think that’s exactly the opposite of what’s going on. I’m not hard enough on myself!

And over the course of the last month instead of writing I’ve been really focusing on photography, drone stuff, graphic design, and a bunch of other things that aren’t primarily writing related. I’ve overwhelmed myself and needed to get my focus narrowed again. Getting to go do a day-long shoot with a few of my friends helped the photographer in me be satisfied for a couple of days:

They’re even photogenic on an off-profile!

And with the gold of May pouring onto trees at sunset I was able to get some good pictures of that, too.

And I’ve also been experimenting with a thing called “databending”, which is where you take an image, turn it into raw data (.tif file format works best, encoded with U-Law), put that data into Audacity, apply an audio effect to the result, and then retransmit that back into an image file (save as… mp3, but then change it to “other uncompressed formats” and apply your own file type extension).

It’ll turn this photo

she's drinking lemonade.jpg
She’s drinking lemonade.

Into this one

she's drinking databend.png
She’s drinking D A T A B E N D

And this was achieved with a reverb effect over 6 minutes or so of the resulting data’s audio. Quite neat to do! I’ve done this after some fractal stuff in GIMP. So that’s pretty cool, I think. I don’t know what practical use it’s gonna have yet, but hey, it’s a thing.


Sheesh, this comes off of testing out stream stuff in this thing I posted today, too.

But today I remembered music can make me think. Not about 5/20/13 or 5/20/14 or 15 or 16 or indeed 17. I had to be Somewhere Else. So I listened to GH by Deadmau5 again for the first time in a long time and the creative taps opened.

Maybe tomorrow I’ll be able to churn some more out. I’ll take my camera to Pierce, leave my laptop here, and continue about my day with notebook at the ready. It’s a nice break from being buried. Probably been why I’ve been creatively blocked lately. I even got a proper twitter @JakeThomasShaw in my frenzy to expand. Still haven’t used it.

Back to the roots, eh? It’s 10:30 PM here and there’s coffee in my veins.

Think about it. A year ago, did you think you’d be here? I certainly didn’t. Voyagers, Foxes, Apocalypses, Destinations, Drones, and  Psychopaths. I never thought I would ever be here. Made it this far, though. There’s so much more to go.

Thank you for tuning in, once again. Radio Reality City survives off of listeners, for if there’s no one to listen to one interpretation, there’s quite no point in being different people. And then there’s no point to defining reality.

There’s only 73 days left to Year v! So go forth, make stuff, and consume reality!

Radio Reality City!