News – Miss Information Issues Statement on Dazzle Figures

Day 1,253 – The Administration issued a statement today regarding the people who don’t exist which seem to be roaming the streets.

They say the key word in that sentence is “seem”, as Miss Information holds fast that the dazzle-painted figures moving around parts of downtown are nothing to be afraid of, and in fact aren’t there at all.

This comes in the wake of a month-long stretch where Mayor Dean has stayed silent on the number of sightings reported in by locals.

Miss Information came forward and declared, “After much scrutiny, we have determined that the figures must have escaped Destiny, or have come from Somewhere Else. Therefore, they do not exist yet, if they are going to exist at all, and should be disregarded. They can cause no harm.”

Some have reported the figures talking gibberish, as well as conjugating entire sentences about where they are from. So far, none of these entities have said anything about anything that has happened, and instead reference events that seemingly haven’t yet.

We’ll update as the matter continues.

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