Wasting Away

My bedroom
Has clothes
Scattered all around

Empty glasses of
Old water ornament
My end table

My pillow’s full
Of dried tears and
Ugly expressions

Somewhere, buried, there’s
Two bags of junk food
Crumpled up and discarded

And when I wake up
Every morning I choke
Back bile

Not just for my own sake
For everyone else’s
I should smile

Not
Wasting away
Not bathing
In sorrow

Hoping the memories
Will swarm and
Take me down
To drown

Pecking like a bird
At a nest to
Make it comfortable
I want all the twigs
And sticks familiar
To soothe my sleeping

All the while hoping
That time will
Move faster while I’m
Hopelessly distracted
But I know it’s
Nothing lasting

How could I ever
Stop this ending?
I thought of her
And that lovesome place,
Relaxed and floated
Into space.

Not
Wasting away

Not catering
To tomorrow

Hoping those thoughts
Will drown
And that one day
I might smile

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