Dread
Waking up at three a.m.
I notice you’ve undressed
Somehow in the interim
Entirely from pajamas
They’ve slid off
Just like my wave of rest
Realizing my hands
Are holding bare skin
And I close in
Ignoring what I know
From yesterday
And the days yet ahead
I thought I’d dreamed of
Sleeping beside you
Feeling your pulse beat
Now as I’m pushing aside
An encroaching fear I push
Blankets between us aside
Maybe this is it
Maybe this all we have
Who knows
No sensation of forthcoming
Pleasure as I wake you
Will push aside that ill dread
No high sighs of your
Stirring voice as I try to
Drown myself will comfort me
Not anymore
No more
To those forlorn
In the dead of night
Someplace we’d never
Been together
Some feelings we’d
Never experience outside
Of the next hour
Gutter turmoil of sloshing
Lusts and desires lazily
Rising to meet what’s next
Trying to look forward to
What might come next
Lost in the waves of blankets
Sweating for no end
No means to reason
The change of season
It was hot in the bed
Maybe it was because
Of that summer dread
It was clear
As I got up to
Open a window
That somehow
This was
It
Somehow
This beaconed an
End
Morose and trapped
Nothing left to do
But to go back to sleep
Nothing left to do
But to lay back
And dream
Try and shut
Out that beaming
Sinking feeling
WELL DONE!
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